Chicago Bears use franchise, no frankfurter ... why?

The term 'franchise tag' is thrown around the sports media with impunity, as if we all know what this stuff really means.

Okay sure, maybe if you play NFL video games you know everything there is about managing a virtual football team, or perhaps you're Mike Tannenbaum and pop up on ESPN every 5 minutes for an argument about coffee stains on contracts, then yes, you love this language. 

Great. But for the rest of us schmoes, this sort of front office jargon is about as irritating as an Adam Gase press conference. 

Wake us up when you have some football news, guys.

For anyone still with us here, Chicago Bears wideout Allen Robinson has had the franchise tag placed upon him, as per our pals at the Worldwide Leader. This is breaking news in 2021, in case you're wondering.

But I'm not actually sure if this involves an in-person scenario where someone pins a Walmart-style price tag to the player, or someone rubber stamps his behind, but he's been marked, okay. Just mark my words.

The crux of the matter is a long-term deal wasn't met between the Bears and Robinson, despite the fact he caught 102 passes for 1,250 yards last season.

So, in short, Allen and Bears bosses didn't see eye-to-eye on money, but rather than lose him to free agency, this 'tag' holds him in Chicago for a year. 

I don't love this idea from the player's perspective because it feels like a 'no-vote' of confidence. It's like betting on both red and black. Are you Team Aniston or Team Jolie? Come on now. The guy carried the club's offense, as NFL.com's Kevin Patra has pointed out.

The tag also means the player gets an average payment in that short time, not necessarily what they deserve out in the open market.

At least throw some lifetime deep dish pizza at the guy ... a little Portillos dog ... invite him to a few tailgate grills ... something. 

Where's Coach Ditka when you need him? He'd straighten this out.

Might the Bears catch us by surprise?

Editor's Note: Following this post, Bears quarterback Jay Cutler yelled at his o-line, pouted on the sideline, and turned in this statline---11 of 27 passes, with four interceptions, for just 126 yards, against the Green Bay Packers. Regardless, we still believe in the potential of the Rah Rah Bears, and any excuse to reference the movie Wild Things. 

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Peyton Manning threw his 400th touchdown pass, Brandon Weeden threw four interceptions, and Tim Tebow completely threw off a touted Bills defense, in what was a strange and wonderful return to Sunday pro football.

But while you're icing down after seeing your Eagles turn turkey against the lowly ranked Brown Dogs, or taking an asprin following your Seahawks distressing loss to the Arizona Kolbs, perhaps divert your thoughts to a club that has been largely unheralded this past off-season---the Chicago Bears.

Jay Cutler's 50-yard torpedo down the middle to rookie Alshon Jeffrey was more beautiful than a Chicago-style at Kim and Carlos's Hot Dog Stand. Say what you want about Cutler's proclivity for wild things and forced errors---his Elway-like launcher could knock a steak from Yogi's grasp at 200 feet. Yes Boo-Boo, the Bears will do a little more than shuffle on through this season as long as Cutler's cutting the mustard.

Cutler was 21 of 35 for 333 yards and threw passes to six different receivers. That group included the most passive-aggressive Bear of all, Matt Forte, who is also unquestionably the most versatile back in the game right now. Forte rushed for 80 yards, but that was just to warm up. He caught three balls for 40 yards as well, in a performance that not only proved his value to Chicago's honchos, we hope, but underscored that this is now a potent and pacey offense.

That Cutler's ol' buddy Brandon Marshall "chipped in" nine receptions for 119 yards and a touchdown, must have had Chicagoans salivating like Al Bundy for a saucy redhead needing new pumps. This was 44 points---albeit against a weak opponent---that wasn't always available in previous seasons. It was an attack buoyed by its potential, and reveling in the bravado of its front man, the moody but brilliant Cutler.

By Sunday night's end they had the league's fifth best land grab with 428 yards of offense, which can only be pleasing to a club that generally hangs its hat on defense.