Popular New York football team based in Jersey seeks urgent services of a professional quarterback - at least in name. Fill in for injured starter; win instant notoriety. Must have an eye for detail, be a team player, and get the best out of others under duress. Absolutely any clock management skills would be looked upon favorably.
Good throwing mechanics are not essential, as long as candidate can move ball from A to B. Heck, we invite anyone able to toss a Nerf ball into a bucket to apply.
Communication skills are a must. However, we don’t expect the successful candidate to be a Harvard Graduate. Having said that, we'll certainly consider those with an Ivy League education; but only if your thumb ligaments are in tact.
Please send resume with video samples of your most recent work. Talking head show-reels from ESPN won’t be considered.
Accepting applications from just about anyone, really. Although if your name happens to be Sanchez, we’ll require photo identification.
Work with a great team that knows when to roll with the punches, and pull its thumb out.