Saturday, February 2, 2013

Kaepernick vs. Flacco: The QB Showdown

Colin Kaepernick
There are so many important match-ups in any given Super Bowl, but perhaps none more talked about than 'who has the better quarterback?'

So here it is---Kap versus Flack!

Colin Kaepernick (in a crowd sounds like: "Hold the pumpernickle"), San Francisco 49ers

Age: 25
Height: 6'4
Weight: 230 lbs (65 of which is ink)
Experience: Just eight meaningful games
Arm strength: Dolph Lundgren in Masters of the Universe
Total yards passing: 1,849
Total yards rushing: 413
Best tattoo: Entire 49ers playbook
Facial hair style: Shaggy from Scooby Doo
Signature move: Flexing bicep
Jersey number: #7 (more Vick than Elway)

Joe Flacco
Joe Flacco (in a crowd sounds like: "No fly zone"), Baltimore Ravens

Age: 26
Height: 6'6
Weight: 245 lbs (5 oz of which are gummy bears in his back pocket)
Experience: 5 years
Arm strength: Sylvester Stallone in Rambo - First Blood Part II
Total yards passing: 17,633
Total yards rushing: 430
Best tattoo: 'I love calzone' in a heart shape
Facial hair style: Sometimes Beckham, other times Yosemite Sam
Signature move: Deer in the headlights look
Jersey number: #5 (should wear No.3 instead, like Lamonica)

Edge: Flacco (Stallone took down Lundgren in Rocky IV after all)

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